Style Identity Crisis? Here’s What I Tell My Clients to Do First
Feeling stuck in your style? Let’s fix that—without buying a single thing.
There comes a point in every closet’s life cycle where something feels… off. You look at your wardrobe and think:
“I have nothing to wear.”
“I don’t even know what I like anymore.”
“How did I end up with so many random pieces?”
That, my friend, is a style identity crisis. And you’re not alone.
Whether your lifestyle has changed, your body has changed, or your taste has simply evolved—feeling disconnected from your wardrobe is frustrating. But it’s also an opportunity.
When I work with clients 1:1, this is where we begin. Not with shopping. Not with trends. But with a reset.
Let me walk you through the exact steps I recommend when you’re not sure who your style is anymore.
Step 1: Audit Your Real Life, Not Just Your Closet
Start by asking yourself:
What does my week actually look like?
Break it into categories like:
Work (in-person or virtual?)
Social events
Date nights
Errands or childcare
Travel
Then ask: Does my closet match my lifestyle—or an outdated version of it?
You may be dressing for a former job, a fantasy version of your social life, or a body that no longer feels like yours. This awareness is the first step to aligning your style with your real life.
Step 2: Don’t Declutter—Just Observe
I don’t believe in editing your closet when you're in crisis mode. You’re too close to the chaos.
Instead, spend a week tracking what you actually wear. Keep a note in your phone or snap mirror selfies. Pay attention to:
What you reached for first
What made you feel good
What you changed out of (and why)
This will reveal patterns you might not realize, like “I always avoid this neckline” or “I love outfits with contrast.”
Step 3: Choose Your 3 Style Words
I use this method with almost every client I work with. Choose three adjectives that describe the style you aspire to. Not what you think you “should” wear—what actually lights you up.
Examples:
Tailored / Relaxed / Effortless
Sculptural / Minimal / Feminine
Romantic / Textural / Grounded
You can test these words against pieces you already own. If they align—great. If not, you’ve found your tension point.
✨ Stylist tip: Update these words seasonally or even monthly. It’s not about boxing yourself in—it’s about giving your style a direction.
Step 4: Curate, Don’t Consume
Once you have clarity on your style words and lifestyle needs, then you can start identifying gaps.
Are you missing a great pair of trousers?
Do you need better layering pieces?
Is everything feeling too sweet and not enough structure?
Now when you shop—whether from an influencer link or IRL—you can say “Does this serve the style I’m building?” instead of “Do I like this in isolation?”
Your Homework:
If this resonated, try this:
Write down what your average week looks like.
Track your outfits for 5–7 days.
Choose 3 style words.
Revisit your closet—not to purge—but to see where those words show up.
And if you're stuck? Drop your current “style crisis” in the comments so I can help!
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P.S. If you want ongoing outfit formulas and deeper style coaching, consider upgrading to a paid subscription. Each Sunday, I send exclusive styling content just for subscribers. 💌
xoxo,
✔️Apply to work with me. My signature process will transform your style in just two sessions. I've helped tons women identify and bring their style to life all while saving them 10's of hours and $1000 of dollars each season.
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