Think back to the biggest work moments of your career.
The presentation that changed your trajectory. The woman who ran the meeting everyone was talking about afterward. The partner who walked into the room and immediately had everyone’s attention. The executive you met once and somehow still remember years later.
Now, picture what they were wearing. I’d bet you can. And I’d also bet they weren’t necessarily wearing the most conventional outfit in the room.
There is a particular piece of advice ambitious women have been handed for decades: If you want to be taken seriously, dress seriously. Keep it polished. Keep it appropriate. Keep it understated. Don’t be too sexy. Don’t be too trendy. Don’t be too colorful. Don’t be too much.
In other words, make yourself difficult to criticize.
The problem is that being difficult to criticize and being memorable are not the same thing.
I saw this tension constantly during my corporate career, and I hear it from clients now. Women want to look authoritative without looking severe. Feminine without looking frivolous. Fashionable without looking like they care more about clothes than their work.
They are trying to solve for a false choice: Do I want to be taken seriously, or do I want to have a point of view?
You can have both.
In fact, I would argue that the women who command the most presence are often the ones who have figured out how to make the two work together.
The wardrobe shift that changed how I showed up
I remember preparing to position myself for the director level in my own career and realizing that my wardrobe needed to change.
Not because I had suddenly become a different person. But my responsibilities were about to.
I was no longer only representing myself. I was representing my team, my business, and the decisions being made around me. I was involved in larger deals and sitting in rooms where the stakes were higher. I was also frequently the youngest person there, sometimes younger than people who reported to me.
And I understood something very clearly: how I showed up was now part of how people experienced my leadership.
So I leveled up my wardrobe. Not by turning myself into someone else. Not by dressing like the men around me. And certainly not by buying an entirely new identity.
I became more intentional.
The quality improved. The silhouettes became sharper. I paid more attention to proportion, fit, and the details that made an outfit feel considered rather than simply assembled. I started dressing for the level of the room I was entering, rather than the level I had already reached.
And I noticed the difference quickly.
I felt more confident. I was more comfortable taking up space. I walked into meetings differently. I was less conscious of whether I looked like I belonged there because, quite simply, I felt like I did.
I was young for my role, and in a largely male-dominated environment, so there were moments when I needed my presence to communicate a level of authority before I had even said a word.
My clothes couldn’t do my job for me. But they could remove a question mark. And that mattered.
Confidence is part of performance
This is where I think the conversation around professional dressing often misses the point. Your clothes aren’t a substitute for competence. They aren’t going to make you a better strategist, leader, negotiator, or executive.
But confidence affects performance.
When you aren’t wondering whether your pants are pulling, whether your dress is too casual, whether you look junior, or whether everyone else in the room seems more polished than you do, you have more mental space for the thing you’re actually there to do.
You can focus on the presentation.
The negotiation.
The relationship.
The decision.
The room.
That is why I don’t believe the goal of professional style is to make you blend in.
The goal is to make you feel so aligned with what you’re wearing that you can stop thinking about what you’re wearing.
And interestingly, that often has very little to do with wearing less.
Bold is not the same as distracting
I work with ambitious women who will sometimes tell me, “I want to have more of a point of view, but I don’t want people to think I’m trying too hard.” Or, “I want to look powerful, but I don’t want to look intimidating.” Or my favorite: “I want people to remember me, but for the right reasons.”
This is where styling becomes more nuanced than simply asking whether something is “professional.”
A bold outfit isn’t inherently unprofessional. A red suit with impeccable tailoring can communicate confidence and authority. A sculptural jacket over a simple trouser can make a traditional work wardrobe feel distinctly yours. A beautifully cut dress in an unexpected color can be every bit as credible as navy. A statement shoe with an otherwise restrained outfit can become a signature rather than a distraction.
Even jewelry can do this. A substantial cuff, an architectural earring, or a distinctive watch can give a simple uniform a point of view without overwhelming it.
The difference is intention.
There is a difference between an outfit that says, I have a point of view, and one that says, I wanted you to notice my outfit.
The first builds presence. The second can compete with it.
The women you remember
This is why I keep coming back to that question: Who do you remember?
Think about the women you’ve worked with who had real presence.
Chances are, you can picture them.
Maybe she always wore a strong jacket. Maybe she had incredible shoes. Maybe she wore color when everyone else wore black. Maybe she had a signature silhouette or a way of combining pieces that felt unmistakably hers.
You probably don’t remember because she was wearing something outrageous.
You remember because she looked like herself, was always put together, fully realized.
That is the distinction I want more women to understand. Professional style isn’t about conforming to a visual standard that makes everyone interchangeable. It’s about understanding the environment you’re operating in well enough to know where you can express yourself, and then having the confidence to do it.
There is room for personality inside authority.
There is room for femininity inside power.
There is room for fashion inside professionalism.
And there is absolutely room for being memorable.
The objective isn’t to walk into a room and have everyone remember your outfit. It’s to walk into a room and have your outfit support the impression you want to leave behind. Because the women who advance aren’t always the women who look the most conventional. They are often the women who know exactly who they are, what they bring to the room, and how to make every part of their presence reinforce it.
xx,
